the last ♥

what? haha

2012-01-22T03:49:00.002+08:00

I miss you so much I feel so numb I don't know what else to do.

without you.

2012-01-20T01:39:00.000+08:00

♥RAFIQ SANUSI!!!!!

I fucking miss you, love :(

(sorry for the vulgarity by the way)

Psyched

2012-01-04T14:33:00.001+08:00

It's official, our results are going to released next Monday, the 9th. Of course I'm nervous, who isn't? Especially when I know I didn't do well, but one thing's for sure, I did my best and I really hope my family and even friends believe me in how I did. Apparently, I'll be coming to school alone, like a boss. Haha, since results will be released at 2, we have to be there by 1.30. Hmmm, well I got alternatives for school though. If I unfortunately don't get into Poly, can I just take the ITE path? ITE's not a bad place after all. Who knows I'd do better there? I really need someone to talk to about this. Sigh.Yes, I know how important education is, but can I just take things slow? Double sigh. I'm feeling numb & dumbfounded now. Geez. Gotta stop thinking about this first.................please.

On the other hand, I'm demoralized cause my dark circles were showing so clearly and Elf noticed them. The most random thing I did when I woke up half an hour ago was definitely surfing the net, tips for removing dark eye circles. Not being a surprised, cucumbers, cold spoons and ice cubes helps though. But the thing that's bothering me is the intake of fruits and vegetables. Adui, how can I eat those? I can't possibly force myself to eat them, I'd probably throw them all out. Hais hais hais. Forget it, I don't care already.

I'm hungry, I shall cook myself lunch. :)

Plans, anyone?

2011-12-24T12:58:00.000+08:00

To be honest, 2011 passed very quickly. Probably because I was taking my O Levels this year. Oh tak eh? I don't know if it's really because of O levels. The next thing you know, it's gonna be 2012 in a week's time. I'm not coming up with resolutions beforehand because I know I will not fulfill it like this year. I went through so much this year, but can I say 2011 wasn't really a fun year? Hmmm. On the other hand, it's okay though. As long as I don't have to go through any crisis. Well, maybe some but it's all forgiven and forgotten. *sigh. One thing's for sure, I gotta lift my head up and receive my results in 2 weeks time. What if I did bad? Geez, I shouldn't talk about this anyway.

Guess everyone else has plans for New Year. Well, girl hopeless95 has no plans for countdown. Other than rotting at home and watch the fireworks on the flat screen, I will pretty much have a mundane new year's eve. What I really hoped for was a first New Years' outing since I'm free from my studies for the next four months. Never mind, let's just make this my usual routine. No plans with the family too. Ha ha ha.

Just a small little update ok. :)

Things just got different.

2011-12-23T01:02:00.002+08:00

I just feel sorry I neglected my blog for Rafiq. Hahahahaha, the fact that I don't update after he came back. Perangai mintak kene tembak.

Oh, hi by the way! :)

A couple of things happened the past few days. Family, friends, etc. And dinner with my family was apparently awesome. It has always been. Although we are just a few miles away from home, eating together at Bukit Panjang was interesting. We had a lot to talk about and obviously, laughter and bonding. Just pure happiness. And, we had dinner again today erm, after visiting Kak Isna's mom at the hospital. She's a very small person though. I find her cute hehe! Brother says that she looks like our late grandma though? I shall take a second look.

And I met Rafiq on Wednesday. Two days ago right? Yeah. It feels great to be able to meet him after he came back. Who doesn't miss him right? Precisely, I do miss him. It's just heartwarming to see him get all excited to see me after 10 days. 10 hari macam 10 tahun gitu tak jumpa. The fact that he won't stop talking to me about things that happened when he was away...I'm just so blessed to have him back here. Exuberant girl 95!!!!! :*

DAY NINE HEHEHE!!!

2011-12-19T23:38:00.001+08:00

Today was the release of N Level results and I went down to Regent to meet the others and I'm glad they got the results they wanted and deserve. Well, most of them. So anyway, I had lunch with them at LJS and had some good laughs too. It just feels awesome that I get to spend time with them after being busy with work for weeks and taking this time off was probably the best decision I've ever came up with. Mmm, I kinda had a 3 hour talk at my void deck and I am freezing now. The weather's just too cold today. Thank god I was wearing long sleeves. BUT WITH DENIM BERMS. Adui, how cold. My toes are freezing now.

And the fact that I'm done with day nine, I'm purely excited for tomorrow since someone's coming back from his ten-day trip! Too excited that I don't have anything much to say now!!!!! :P

Yes, please do. ;)

Day eight

2011-12-18T22:10:00.003+08:00

As much as I wanna complain how my day went suckish, I got it over with a random dinner with my parents, aunt and my cousin. Meeting only after weeks, I guess I really have a lot to talk about to her and it's just so funny that we're reminiscing the things that happened the past few weeks, and also boys. No surprise? Girls talk about boys a lot though. I really felt good having someone to let it out to, and I hope my cousin felt the same too. The only thing that makes it weird is she's two years younger than me and she totally understands. Although I have female cousin who's the same age as me, I guess we have our differences too. I just gotta accept that right. Whatever it is, no complaints, I am just grateful to have company.

Tsk, I keep worrying about my hair. About how longer it's getting, but also how weak it is now. But it's apparently in place today and I really love it. Gosh, stay this way everyday k hair? Maybe it's just the weather I suppose. AND, I really want to watch some movies tonight. Wanna join? HAH K. Brides maids, or In her shoes? I just can't seem to decide. Uhm, okay, I'll go with both then since I got my beauty nap in the afternoon. Hehe.

Good luck for results, N-Level takers!

Precisely.

Someone went off to Bromo to enjoy his last day or two at Indonesia.

Take care okay, appreciate the text you sent me from Surabaya. ♥

Day seven

2011-12-17T15:12:00.000+08:00

Okay, so where do I start? Hmm! This might most probably be the earliest post I've ever came up with for the past week since the family might be going out later and I might not be able to summarize my whole day at the end of the night. Apparently, I'm so freaking bored, I don't know what else to do now to fill my free time. Uhm, besides listening to Chris Brown's old songs, I swear I have nothing else to do. Gosh, help me please. I just feel like going to Scape's flea market since everybody else in the house is rotting too! Shrieks, I'm replaying Take You Down aaahhh just so sexy lah you Chris Brown.

Anyway, Resorts World tonight? Alright. I have barely anything to say now, just because my day hasn't really officially started. Mmmm, kay.

And oh, I am really proud of the century I'm brought into. I gotta take a minute to thank whoever came up with technology, and specifically Skype that I'm able to make video calls with my lover boy last night. (Not to mention, his cousin and lil bro too!) Hehe, but all that's making me miss him more though. :)

And yeay, it has been a week! Less than 3 days okay, just 3 more days to bear with.

Day six

2011-12-16T23:14:00.003+08:00

I spent my whole day sleeping and rotting at home and the only thing that passed through my mind to eventually kill my time was taking webcam photos of myself. In other words, syiok sendiri. And to be honest, it was a perfect hair day that my hair tend to get so soft and I guess I really have to stop being so excited about my hair. Haha, as much as I badly want my straight hair back, I don't want lose my wavy hair either. Aaah, the irony. Hmm, I guess the cool weather contributed to my sleep too! I really had a good nap and waking up to having KFC for dinner is the bomb. I had some bonding sessions with mum at Keat Hong since accompanying her to get some credits would be a great way to get away from the boys. Har har har. It really feels good though. And Ibu asked me who's the person in my pink frame? Hmmm! Hehehe. :)

So anyway, I was being scolded umpteen times today since mum caught me munching on ice red-handed. Gah, I'm gonna lose my teeth sooner or later. Like seriously, how do I stop? It' just too addictive I can't stop.

Oh, I'm also excited that I have a dvd player in my room after years! I'm going on a movie marathon tonight! Let's see what's the pick of my movies........hmmm. Korean dramas? Okay no. Romance? Haha! Gonna cuddle in my sheets with myself and get emotional with those shows! Ummmm k.

Bleargh, another sleepless night!

Less than 4 more days, 3 nights baby.

This?

Says it all. I love Rafiq ♥

Day five

2011-12-15T22:30:00.000+08:00

I just had my late dinner and I was just sitting by my bed, apparently, I had nothing else to do other than web browsing, Facebook, Twitter, just going online with my Youtube tab open too. My Twitter timeline is full of fan girls getting excited about One Direction, but I don't mind though. I know how it feels to be a fan girl! Haha. And Alvin & The Chipmunks 3 hit the cinemas today and I'm not gonna watch it any sooner. Well, maybe just on the internet. I just can't stand sitting on the cinema sofas and watch movies without being able to move etc. Obviously, I'm more of a home individual. Hehe.

I woke up to Ibu screaming and shouting in my room because we need to visit her friend who just recovered from 2 weeks of fever, and tangibly, with my "busuk-but-doesn't-give-a-damn" face, I just changed and went out. I know it's kind of disgusting but it was just an half an hour visit to her friend's house and to be honest, my mum looks like her friend. Same facial features, just that my mum's a little bit fleshier especially at her belly! Hahah! Okay, I'm sorry.

I think I made day five pass fast today. Glad, happy. Now, left with less than 5 days till my baby comes back. :B

And oh, I was browsing through Tumblr, and I came across theboyswho.tumblr.com's posts, and everything they post there, it's just too much that I can relate to :') This post is my ultimate favourite. Rafiq never fails to kiss me on my forehead every single time. Sayaaaaaang dia! ♥

Day four

2011-12-14T21:40:00.002+08:00

Nothing much happened on day four, but I was being the most kind soul on Earth that I accompanied Amir to find his bag for work, and apparently, we found the perfect item for him. We, in other words, are me and Farris. So, it was kinda an unofficial cousins outing today and also Amir's belated 16th. Farris came down last minute after I caught a movie with Amir and they just had to tease me about every little thing I do.....boys. Anyway, my knee was getting all itchy because my hand was itchy and there's a cute little scar. Wait, since when scars are cute? Bleargh. We got back home early since there's no other plans and I met ibu and the others at Sinaran. Had my supper, forced myself to eat and now I'm full like an elephant. 3 pages already! Haha, kidding! Plus, I saw A&F's models outside the A&F shop. Hmmm, not really into abang-abang body though :B

Such a pinky day.

I'm totally in love with my pink rose hair clip! Hehehehe, tak menyesal lah beli semalam ;)

And I'm listening to my Mcfly all time favourite song, All About You. ♥ Still.missing.Rafiq.like.a.kid.misses.their.blanket.

Less than 6 days, 144 hours, 8640 minutes, 518400 seconds. K.

Day three

2011-12-13T22:10:00.003+08:00

I went for a mini shopping session and hanged out at JCP's Mccafe with my dear little sister, Sabrina! I really have to thank her for the Mccafe treat and withstanding the long window shopping because I was finding the perfect item to buy, and apparently, I did! Bertie Boyfriend tee from Cotton On (although I'm not a fan of CO though)! And we took a photo for the first time and what's disturbing me the most is I'm getting rounder :-( Offended much, I guess I have to starve myself. Alright no, I don't think I'm that fat anyway but these cheeks, hmmmmm...... Ok.

And my dear Rafiq texted me earlier on, and nothing can make me feel much more happier!

And it makes me wonder......

How did we get together again, my dear? Haha. I am suddenly reminded of the time when we were still friends. Gosh, nothing more, nothing less. Just friends. Just super duper grateful now that I'm yours. I am, right? :p

I just simply love you. ♥

And the plan for tomorrow, town town town! ;)

Day two

2011-12-12T19:27:00.003+08:00

It was apparently a stay home Monday for me. I had nothing else to do. I wanted to try plucking in my Ps2 in my room but I'm scared I'm gonna mess the whole house up, and obviously I'm gonna be shouted at if brother finds out. So pissed that I'm already used to waking up early even though I didn't turn in early last night. I just feel so draggy now, and I changed every single fact that I don't sleep in the afternoon. Pfft, I did. Twice today. I just feel so fresh but my eyes won't stop twitching. Tired much? Haha. Since I got the holidays all to myself, I really really really want to clear my eye bags and dark circles! As much as you think these things don't matter to girls, I guess you're wrong.

Turning in early today, that's for sure.

I've never been so stressed out in my whole life. Guess why? My hair fall. It's getting so fucked up and I'm worrying, which leads to more hair fall. Okay, must go on a chicken strike! Lol okay, no. Never will I ever do that. I just need to get my intake of fruits & veggies, even though I'm super reluctant. Sugar intake is increasing; Sabrina is bringing me out to Jurong Central Park for our Mccafe and I'm out to survey my beanie at Rubi. Wuuhuu! I really want to go all out this week, just to make time past very swiftly. And my dear cousin/best friend Amir Shazman asked me out to accompany him to buy his Messenger bag on Wednesday. Okay, any plans on Thursday? HAHA K.

I'm so really fucking pissed at MD. R E A L L Y, you guys are getting my nerves.
Maybe that's where your opportunity comes from, but one thing's for sure, it's not where mine is coming from.And Ibu Ji came into my room, and lay on the bed with me just to talk to me. Honest conversation about work, she really understand. Grateful, thankful and everything else.

I dreamt about Rafiq kissing my forehead, guess I really miss him mmm.

Day one

2011-12-12T00:05:00.000+08:00

I accompanied Aina, working for a wedding reception this afternoon and damn it, her friend's brother is just the most irritating asshole ever. Bodoh, pondan, monyet, babi. He flirts like no one's watching, even having the guts to ask Aina to kiss him just to get a pack of ice cream. Pathetic much or just desperate? Tsk, you don't just hit on your sister's friend. Okay, sorry I'm just so pissed at him that I lost my mood. Well, let's convince myself it was just about that fucker. Looking on the bright side, we earned our 40 bucks and I wasn't that exhausted. Just that I needed some rest in replacement for yesterday, for which I slept at 2am. Disturbed much :-(

Headed to town with my family after sunset and I guess I had a lot of time to take my mind off everything else. Since I had extra cash, Kakak brought me to Cine and we bought Best Fries Forever! Hooked on Macho Cheese and I swear I wanna go eat it again. Okay, after Rafiq comes back! Nak feeling feeling sweet boleh? Hehe, no. I mean, we're already sweet. HAHA. K, behead me please! Anyway, while we were at town, I was surveying head accessories and also basic tees from F21 & H&M. Just couldn't find anything that I like! Hmmmm. Sadgirl95.

What cracks me up was Elfie running and laughing like a baby polar bear and I just adore that little Chinese boy.

Had a jolly good time at supper, as always ;-)

OH! In addition, 12-Dec-11. It's Amir Shazman's sweet sixteenth!
Gave you a long text okay gemuk. Have a good day at work!!!!!!!!

9 more days, patience.

Gone away.

2011-12-10T11:27:00.003+08:00

I don't know whether I should be sad that he's gonna be away for more than a week or happy for him that he's gonna go enjoy his holidays. I really have to let it go though.

Enjoy your trip, will be waiting for you in Singapore okay!

I'm a fish out of water without you.

I called Farris early in the morning so that he'll talk to me about my decisions on staying in MD. Bagus juga ada sedara yang sanggup layan pagi pagi buta. Haha. Apparently, he woke up because I called otherwise he'd still be sleeping like an asshole. I requested to quit MD and I called my in-charge. Not that I don't like the retail line, I just can't get used to my colleagues. Well, not saying that I'm anti-social, it's just that they're so judgmental. Another point, it's just too tiring. MD is such a high end brand that I can't live up to. Forever21 for the win. Urm, I sound likka betrayer.

Now that I've free time for the whole week, what shall I do? Apart from visiting all my relatives (I feel like it's Raya and I miss my cousins!), I guess having the PS2 in my room would be great. Dvd players. Woahh, I'm really getting in the holiday mood. And I'm talking to Azy & Aina, gosh. Ring a bell? Miss those two! Macam nak lari dekat dorang abeh peluk aja macam polar bear. K.

You make me feel like I'm on top of the world

2011-12-07T23:15:00.003+08:00

Rafiq, 3 more days till you go away.

Hais, as much as I don't wanna make this a big issue, how am I gonna go 10 days without you when I'm so used to hearing your soothing voice, getting interesting, sweet texts from you every single lonely night. I guess I'll do fine with your absence next week now that I'm keeping myself busy with 50 hours of work. Never mind, it's okay. I just wanna you to come back being the same old guy I love, and of course in one piece. Take very good care of yourself while you're in Indonesia & Malaysia.

Don't worry about me though. Although I became so worked up in front of you and broke down emotionally, it was just for that point of time. Let me get used without your presence. I swear it's gonna be easy for me in the future if you're gone for a month instead ;)

Trust me, I'll love you forever and always, without any changes.
Hmm, well maybe more though?
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, dear!

Jangan lupa souvenir okay. HEHE.

Love love love love love love love you.

And at least, please update me whenever you're there.

Just anytime okay please, I don't wanna end up worrying about you, butch.

Hugs & kisses, love & misses♥

If that's what you want

2011-11-30T23:16:00.003+08:00

The highlight of today was definitely Breaking Dawn! Yes I finally got to watch it! I was pumped up before the movie, though I didn't show my excitement. I really love Bella & Edward's wedding with the white floral decorations, ahhh. The fact that I'm trying to imagine my wedding? Slap me! Haha! Nah, sorry I was just trying to get in the mood though! And honestly, this movie is one of the saddest movie I've ever watched which apparently made me cry likka baby. But I'm so grateful Rafiq was there to watch it with me! It's been a while since I went to the movies though ;)

On the other hand, don't you love this part of the movie? I actually jumped from my seat because Bella opened her eyes during her wake all of a sudden. And yay, she's a vampire now! Now it makes me impatient for part two! Adui, Renesmee is gonna grow up to a pretty lady, and apparently, she's gonna hook up with Jacob! Muahaha, but I am not sure if that's a good thing for Bella? Well I'm sure she thinks it's a good idea. BUT HE'S HER EX FOR GOODNESS SAKE. Bitch. Haha.

Yesterday was my second day at work and I had to go by myself cause this pretty lady had to punch in earlier :(
I find second day livelier than the first since I mixed around now and I made a few friends though. I'm still trying to work things out with my colleagues and I really wanna go to lunch with Syafiq since he's the only Malay there. Not inclusive of Azimmi though. Haha, Joanne accompanied me for lunch, dinner yesterday and we had to do full shift. Tiring much! Exuberant that I got my 9 hours of sleep! More than enough though ;)

Well, another day, another story!

Keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm making

2011-11-25T09:18:00.003+08:00

Who ever thought graduating from secondary school was this miserable? I mean, I miss the times we had in class, in school. Apparently, I am thankful that I came into Regent and graduated but the only thing that made me upset was the absence of Prom Night this year. How my batch mates would be complaining, I feel the same way too. It would have probably been the night of our lives since we get to dress up and impress others. Gosh, really really upsetting.

On the other hand, I got a call from Massimo Dutti and they had to change my bloody roster. Hais, I swear I prefer punching in for work in the morning. Unfortunately, they shifted me for the afternoon shift, urm which means that I'll be home late at night instead. Never mind, I hope Abang can fetch me from work since he's clearing his leave. And, he wants me to bring a helmet to work?! Haha, never ever ever ever! Mmmm..........

And the family's heading to the beach tomorrow, yay?

Better than better could ever be.

2011-11-24T02:01:00.002+08:00

I'm left with less than four days to enjoy my holidays. Since work starts on this coming Monday, I am honestly nervous to be starting from scratch, working as a retail assistant in town. And what scares me most is connecting with customers, socially. What if they're rude assholes? What if I screwed up on my first day? What if my colleagues don't like me? That's the problem with me. I suppose I lack self-confidence and my best bud had to agree on this ruthless statement. Well, on the brighter side, Farris is giving me some motivation to help me start off with work. But, I suppose I'll be having my lunch alone since Amir and the other gays haven't start work until 11 December. Fucked up much, but I think it's gonna be worth it. Bismillah. Grateful that everyone else is giving me their support before the start of my job. Praises to Allah that I have these people in my life. Amin!

Hopefully everything turns out alright.

I gotta frank with myself and everyone else. I have been enjoying life ever since this unexpected man came into my life and changed everything, in a good way of course. Well, who ever thought this would happen.

Off to my beauty sleep lovelies.

Naww :(

2011-09-24T21:57:00.000+08:00

♥ I miss you little angel. :(

ultra interesting.

2011-09-23T21:21:00.002+08:00

Looking at my junior's pictures kinda made me miss my early years in Regent. I miss being a kid. I was immature, unequivocally and I bet everyone was. Those days when we get along in class, taking pictures when teacher's looking. I miss the days when we get scared when we got caught because of improper attire. Gosh, I feel like an ass wipe now. Haha! But it was the best years in my life. Secondary 4 life is so stressing! Making family proud etc. And with that, I don't really like the idea of graduating on the eve of my birthday. I suppose I'm never gonna meet the NA batch only after O Levels. Nevermind, have to get a job right after. O levels is just a month away! Gosh I can make a different, can't I?

Do it all over again.

2011-09-19T19:48:00.002+08:00

Apparently, I went to Universal Studios Singapore for the second time yesterday and I think I really enjoyed myself, but it's not exciting to see the places there since I've been there before. Mood killer part one. I was listless for a moment but things started to get very exciting after we took a mini roller coaster ride at Far Far Away. I kinda know the ways to get around there but sadly, I only found out about the Solomon Harts' warehouse (I think!) alley yesterday. Wasted, but at least something new. USS looks so convincing. On the other hand, I literally shouted whenever I see any mascots loitering around the area and obviously we snapped a lot of pictures. 3 photo albums wasn't much of a problem anyway. Favourite line of the day: "Meet you @ New York". Probably make sense but I think it's cool that way. Lunch at Mel's was the best of all! HEHEH. Oh yes, and Cylon? Mood killer part two. I freaking threw up just because of that. Still worth the money. ;)

I freaked out watching Lady Gaga's new mv. Just so you know, I feel so freaking disturbed.

As long as you're there. ♥

2011-09-09T10:52:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I haven't been staying at home for the past five days, or let's just say the September holidays. I wouldn't call myself busy but occupied instead. On the other hand, I'm making plans for next week too. Well maybe just for this one certain day. I've been there once but I didn't really enjoyed that day coz' I had to rush home early and it was a false alarm. Annoying much. So anyway, Universal Studios is gonna be fun since I'm going with the girls! Pretty excited. My cousin wanted to follow but I guess she has to buy the 72 bucks tickets if she wants to follow. Hmm. Now, I feel bad. Coz' she confirmed later than expected. Okay whatever it is, we shall see how things go.

As mentioned, I'm going out today. But I think it's gonna be very awkward since we're going out with other class's Hari Raya outing. We, as in, me and Syakila. But let's pray hard things go smoothly. Urm, unlike last year..... So besides that, I hope I don't die with my heels. Literally. Haha.

I'm getting more and more 'jiwang' each day. In other words, emotional. I had this conversation with Safwan yesterday in the bus, on our way home and we both share the same thought, which we usually do. Getting back to the point, we're getting tired with our lives, and we're only sixteen. But persuading him that studies matter too, I guess he just wants a good future to live with. Well, I want the same too. Who doesn't? Furthermore, efforts counts. I have to start now. Guess I need more motivation. Hah, pathetic much.

On a random note, the population of longboarders in Singapore is increasing. Not making it a huge matter to deal with. Just that, I'm sustaining my position as an amateur till the end of O Level. BUT, I have to burn shuvit sooner now. I'm just so scared to land. Okay getting over this might be a huge achievement. HOLD ON, STUDIES BEFORE PLAY. UH. #turnoff? HAHA. No.

The long distance is killing me.

2011-08-22T11:41:00.004+08:00

"It's not up to me anymore. If you want me in your life, you'll put me in it."

I can't complain that I'm learning to take things easy now. Life is pretty much about give and take. Otherwise, we can never enjoy living. Though I think I procrastinate a lot about my academic studies in school, I hope I can really really pull through O Level. I got my Malay results last Thursday, only to find myself drowned in disappointment. That is what I can honestly say about my results, but yeah, we can never move on if we don't let go. I got over the fact that I didn't ace my Malay, and I have to pretty much give an angle to my other six subjects for the upcoming major exams. 2 months and 2 days to go. Okay, wish me luck about this. Sweating bullets now! Hopefully, things go smoothly. Oh my, doubt I'd be going to Korea next year. BOOOO! :(

Time flies very fast. I can't believe it's already the last week of July and that particularly means that it's Lebaran next week! I can just feel the sense of excitement in me, even though everyone else doesn't. The fact that I'm home alone, I'm actually blasting Raya songs to my eardrums. But the sad thing is, I still have three more prelims exam papers to pull through. One of them is ART. Equals to hell. Fake. I'm done with my first page but I guess I really need some motivation to do the other 4 pages. Mmmm. So anyone? Haha.

I've been having hiccups since last night and I really don't know the reason to it. It's manageable at first but subsequently gets very irritating. The only way to stop it is drink plain water but how am I supposed to drink when I'm fasting?!?!?!?! I should just slit my throat. It makes me wanna spout every bad words I know of. AHHH. Also, brother came back home on Friday and it feels nice that he's back after 3 weeks. But now, he's back in camp. Well, the family has to get used to it though :)

Pacing back and forth.

2011-08-17T23:00:00.002+08:00

Pretty much unsatisfied with things going around me. But what can I do to change these things? Haha, NOTHING. No matter how pissed I can be right now, no matter how bad I want these particular things to change, I really can't help! Oh my god, I just feel like shouting somewhere around. On the other hand, it serves me right too. I just expect things too much that I'm disappointed myself. Great. Awesome. I just feel so useless now. It feels like I'm living in an empty frame. Plain and hopeless. Thanks for making me feel this way. Hah.

Okay skip on this part.
I lost my mood. Bye.

You left me hanging by a thread.

2011-08-16T22:22:00.003+08:00

"The best revenge is to show your ex that life is better after they're gone."

It's the Prelim week now and I didn't manage to make preparations for my exams. I just feel so guilty but I swear I didn't do anything about it. Well maybe last minute revisions with my brother would do. But Maths Paper 1 in the morning was a killer! I honestly think it's even harder than O Levels, cause last year papers were much more easier. Okay, I feel like a total idiot trying to solve those questions and at the same time, WARM. The hall feels stuffy with the 6 classes and I can't take my neck strain. And worst, there's Maths Paper 2, Principles of Accounts Paper 1 and O Level English Oral. Butterflies in my stomach! Oh my. I hope I do well!

Xoxo.

2011-08-10T11:56:00.002+08:00

My Samsung phone has been dying on me every single time I turn on a song and I don't think I can make it anymore. I just feel like getting a Blackberry next month and for the next 3 months, I'll be using iPhone 4. I just made myself feel greedy but yum, I got the urge to use that phone since last year, and I wonder if I ever got the chance to use it this year.
Anyway, I've been on Aj Rafael's youtube channel since morning and his song covers are really nice, especially Talking to the moon. Okay, I honestly don't have much to say. HEHE.

On the other hand, this little girl crossed my mind earlier and I really miss her. What she's up to now, how she have been etc. I bet she doesn't even recognize us anymore. HAIS. But she better live up to her name, Chantek. Hmm, she would know how to crawl or walk now. AHHH, I miss you little sister. Hope you're doing perfectly fine.

I start to feel cold.

2011-08-08T14:07:00.003+08:00

My week was honestly hectic but I really enjoyed it with both my family and friends. Well, my family went out to town last night to Suntec for the IT show but we can't seem to find anything that we need to buy. Abang Is and Abang Ninoi was there too, not to forget Kak Farah. We visited Masjid Sultan's bazaar before heading to town and I was getting pretty excited when Abang said he's getting me an iphone at the end of four months. One way or another, I'll still be using an iPhone. Addition to that, I got my new number and brother subscribed my plan to data, which I didn't expect at all! On the other hand, I'm still grateful. Thanks brother. I just have to gain my trust from both my beloved brothers by maintaining my bill for this month. But hey, I haven't even start using it yet. I just feel the need to empty my prepaid number. He he he.

Plus, Vivocity last night was the sex. I made a trip to 'Atlanta'. Haha, I mean I took the National Geographic's challenge of -5 degrees Celsius in the chamber. It was honestly the coolest thing ever but I think the purpose of their challenge is to prove their camera's stability. Shockproof, waterproof that kind of stuffs. I don't really care but Kak Farah paid for the entry which was only 1 dollar. And I kind of lost a lot of heat in the freaking chamber. It was so cold that my eyes were filled with tears.

Shaz, Afiq and Farris is at my house now, but it seems like the boys are more into Guitar Hero than covers currently. Poor Shaz.

We can watch the sunrise.

2011-08-06T02:54:00.002+08:00

I just have the urge to update my blog in the wee hours since I'm really bored and all I'm doing now is texting Amir and chatting with Elfy. I'm planning to get a pair of Toms cause' my shoe wardrobe is only full with 3 pairs of Vans shoes, and 2 pairs of Neckermann slippers. Another point to that is, Amir is getting the same pair as I am. Okay, it's a planned thing though, but I think it's real nice to have the same pair of shoes, probably with my best friend, yes. Anyway, Grey Toms are totally cool. ;) Okay, as a matter of fact, my wardrobe is getting mundane and I really really really feel like buying new clothes and I wanna grab a tie dye t-shirt before the year ends. Probably I'd make use of the shirt for skate. Haha! Well, it gives that hippie look doesn't it. Pfft, okay wannabe. I just want to get those. Hmmm, kinky.

On the other hand, Lianling, Tingting and Yanping accompanied us for break fast last night and I'm very appreciative and feel so honoured. They're just too cute to be with. Lianling couldn't keep her mouth shut the whole time and I made her limit to only 10 sentences. But too bad she can't make it. And the funny part during break fast today was a stupid 'scissors, paper, stone game. who loses eat the chilli.' And my dear Lianling is the official all-time captain loser. Haha! Enjoyed my day with the nine girls, it's just too hilarious. And thanks to Mirah's sister and bro-in-law for sending me and the others home. :)

Officially missing my second brother. ♥

Confidence.

2011-07-29T23:36:00.004+08:00

I just feel like a jerk eating the Ben & Jerry's ice cream Ms Koo bought for the relay runners. Okay even though I'm just a reserve runner, I don't really think I deserve the pint of ice cream. But for goodness sake, it's cookie dough is so amazing! But let's put it this way, Cold Rocks is so much better! Hmmm, but what difference does it make! Hehe. And since I'm talking about food now, I really enjoyed eating with my paternal family♥ at Simpang Bedok last Sunday! The best day ever! Okay not, because most of them were having mood swings. Irritating much! On the other hand, I really really love having their company. That's just the way I appreciate them ;)
Much much much love!

The fact that I finished my art coursework made me going! I just can't wait to finish my preparatory work before the middle of august but I really don't know what techniques I should use for my drawing. I honestly don't know how to draw and my 'dream' to ace my art is never gonna come true. Truth is, my art skills sucks to the coreeeeeeeeeeee. I kept failing my art since sec one, but things got better since I got into sec 3. Hehe ;) Yes, I should be grateful to umi for her guidance. And I should thank Shaz for helping me cut my board and a small little portion of my papercut. I was a little little disappointed I didn't get the 10th position but it's okay, things don't really matter now. I'm just happy that my art classmates are there, just there. I just feel so happy nowadays.

It ends tonight.

2011-07-24T16:22:00.003+08:00

I wasn't in the mood to update my blog the past few days, or probably weeks.

Anyway, last week was spent on Abang Is and Kak Ira's birthday, which I enjoyed a lot, and had a great time hiding from them at the airport while watching Fugitive: Plan B with Abang Inoi. And before that, I went to City Hall with Wawan and my two other little cousins. Bought 8 helium balloons for the birthday surprise and we were off to the airport! Met the others at East coast and we came home late. So shagged, dragged till today. He he.
I luv my family!

Amir got really guilty after he spoiled my spare phone as it dropped from level 5 and it's now gone. I can really sense the guilt he felt but I didn't really mind about my phone though. As long as I have mine, I'm good to go! Notwithstanding, I wanna get a new phone so baddddddd. Blackberry maybe? Okay hell with that! Just an android phone please. Heh. And I had the most interesting talk with Amir yesterday when we spoke about the times we share together as best friends. Uwah, I honestly think I won't forget him after O levels. Keep the friendship going uh!

My playlist is randomly shuffled to Maroon 5's songs right now, and it feels really nice to relive the old times with their songs. "I don't believe in you anymore, anymoreeee." Okay, it's on a random note anyway. I'm hooked on Teddy Geiger's For You I will, and yes I know it's 2007 song, but it is the sex! Wouldn't make a difference right? :)

I'm heading out sooner or later because my paternal family wants to get the guys Raya clothes for this year. I know it's early but we have to get it from my brother gets enlisted into National Service on the 1st. We're off to Geylang in a while and I really wanna get some KFC cheese fries later. UHM, should i or should i not charge the dslr's battery? Okay shiznit, I forgot! Guess there's no camera today. Boohoo!
Peace be upon you! I'm getting ready now :b

Haunted.

2011-07-14T23:39:00.002+08:00

I'm getting frustrated with Dad because he's been farting since he got home and I really wonder how much he's gonna hold that shit in. What the hell, the house smell so bad right now, I can honestly get dizzy. Okay whatever, looking on the bright side, Mum bought me food from Geylang, but my stomach, can't make it anymore. I waited mum long enough just now that I cooked maggie before she came home. I appreciate her thought to buy me a packet of nasi goreng but sorry mum, the ikan bilis spikes my throat. I have cough, remember?

Ah, that reminds me. I have to eat cough syrup tonight. I really can't stand my throat today and the fact that my mucus keeps 'rolling' down my nose. Okay sorry I couldn't find a better word to describe my flu, and during Chemistry class today, Ms koo suggested that I stop doing the experiment, I was sneezing non-stop. Sucks to the effing core. I felt better in the afternoon since the sun was up! :3

I killed myself and Bryan. We were supposed to hand in the class montage and thank you cards but we didn't manage to do anything at all! I just think we're pretty much busy with our school schedule honestly! Chiong the cards tomorrow. Hopefully Bio would be two free periods. PLEASE! We need the time. HMMM.

Nobody's perfect.

2011-07-09T01:35:00.002+08:00

Umi just wasn't herself today in art class. She really freaked out a lot in art class, and at some point of time, I just feel guilty. Okay, even though I didn't do anything, still, she's not okay. Something must've had happened. Erm okay I shouldn't dig my nose in her books. She'll be fine I guess. So anyway, I'm 50% done with my papercut and I'm super glad that I pasted most of the colours on my velvet! I'm so in love with colours, but hate the fact that I can't visualize properly. Sucker for life.

I really love today for another reason, longboard. Finally played with my longboard after a few weeks, and I think my speed is improving! He he he. Cruised after art around 9.15 with Shaz from Yew tee mrt to cck mrt. So tiring yet so fun. TGID.

Okay, pardon me I'm talking shit. I'm just pree tired.
Till next time? HEE :D Night.

Got things complicated.

2011-07-06T22:43:00.002+08:00

Even though I can be so disappointed with the things happening around me, I just don't think I should give it a deep thought though. Yes, I'm aware I should not talk about people and how they should use the time to improve themselves, I couldn't be bothered anymore. As much as people think I'm broken inside, well I'm not. I'm just getting a little bit stronger. I have the strength to get up and face all the little things that keeps getting in my way every now and then. A happy girl has a happy life. I'm pretty much glad that I have people to stand by me in times of need.
Sorry, I just feel that I had to let this shit out.

I'm really unsure about my feelings now. As much as I want to be in a relationship, I just have to hold this temptation to find a new boyfriend till I'm done with my O'levels (since it's the first priority in my academic life now). I just don't feel good to be getting used with someone new to feel my love, chey. But honestly, I can get very scared to show my love. I'm pretty much afraid I would make the same mistakes again. Yes, probably a sucker at love, Atyqa. Teet! Turn off. At the end of the day, I'm still 'Happy Atyqa' without a boyfriend :D
But I feel like a jerk now, I just pretty much miss my ex-boyfriend.
Uhh, the most recent one. Okay, I should just shut the hell up.

On the other hand, I really really really really super duper duper super miss longboarding. It has been weeks. Endure! Till after the o levels baby! BRRR ~ can't wait. :)

Imagine us together.

2011-07-02T18:40:00.002+08:00

The fact that I'm in the welfare community of the class, me and Bryan were assigned to create a class montage for Graduation night on the 14th October, most probably. But damn that fact that we have to submit our videos on 14th of July. I couldn't come up with any idea to make the class montage but polaroids may be the only way for me to decorate the cards for Tony and Hui Ching. (chey, aku bebual macam dorang kawan aku gitu lolol) So, I have to rush things and reschedule my things. I don't know if we could finish it on time, but oh God, please help me!!!

Regent After Hours for art students was the sex! We stayed in school till 9.30 and Elf & Wawan fetched me and Shaz from school. CHO CWEET! On the other hand, our Fridays are ruined since we have to stayback till very late at night. Thank god we have ample time to shower, eat etc. Sempat jugak aku tengok first half bola semalam.

But I should have brought my shortboard along. Transport home could have been better. I was just so tired from the class. Hmm, but it's okay. It's kinda fun though! :D

It's been 2 weeks since I last skate and I honestly miss it :(
I don't how much longer I have to endure. I just have the urge to skate right now, but.. but.. I just don't know. Macam malas pun ada. Apparently, I slack my ass off at home. Eat watch tv laptop text and the same routine over and over again. Ya, I'm a no lifer.

barnett.

2011-06-30T22:12:00.002+08:00

I FELL SICK.

will be back to blogging soon. pronto.

the littlest things

2011-06-27T23:07:00.003+08:00

I'm currently listening to Colbie Caliat's songs and I did the most random edit on my photo five minutes ago. I don't really like her 'The Little Things' song but I'm into the lyrics, so teet! Nothing can actually replace my CNBlue! Apologies, I'm too obsessed in CNBlue but I can't seem to stop smiling from the things I've imagined about Yonghwa and Seohyun. I just wanna know if they're dating. Perfect combination! ♥

Happy birthday to Seohyun-unnie and Minhyuk-oppa!

I was more or less excited for the 28th because it's Seohyun-unnie's birthday and I wonder if Yonghwa celebrates it with her. See, my imagination is definitely running wild. But thank god I'm feeling so happy now. I flooded my phone playlist with CNBlue's songs and especially from the recent album, First Step. I sound pretty much like a fan girl right now and couldn't care less! OMG, sorry I love Yongseo too much. I miss watching their episodes on WGM. Hmm....

Anyway, KL trip was boring! Honest remark! But I swear I just had to go with the flow and I managed to grab this Rayban pair of shades, and I just find it so pretty. It just gives off this feeling. Okay, no more exaggeration!
Addition to my day today, I had fun at Farris's house with Shaz and Fan. She recorded a video of me and Farris but I'm not sure about the uploading part. Damn, I laughed like there's no tomorrow, it was just damn funny like bird. LOL. And for the whole of term 3, I'm officially finishing school at 7pm, E V E R Y D A Y, pronto. Ishk. :(

YONGGGG HYUNNN .

2011-06-24T15:26:00.004+08:00

I wanted to post a little bit earlier just now, but I was busy indulging into my personal pint of Ben & Jerry ice cream and I can't seem to think about what to post on my blog huh just now. Haha, okay I'm so sorry. The mini laptop has been repaired, yeah yeah! And to think I've been in front of the computer since 11.30am. Blame today, it's just so boring. And I was home alone for awhile, and mum didn't come home during lunch so I'm still a hungry lion. Zzz.

Ruining the week, is probably school on Monday. Damn, school is finally reopening after 2 weeks (according to my o level schedule, HAHA!). Ya, we graduating classes don't really feel the holidays though. Never mind, we shall finish the N and O levels asap, and we'll then enjoy right after. Am I right! Plus, supposingly, there's Art today, but I didn't feel well, just a slight one though. Apparently I didn't attend because it wasn't compulsory and Nadhirah didn't go too. Step one for all, all for one aje.

I got mad at Dad for the whole week because he forced me to join him on the KL trip to see his niece/nephew getting married. Sorry I couldn't care less but I can't do anything anymore. I'm like updating my playlist before I set off after sunset later on. Sad life, I wanna spend my weekends in Singapore instead. And I have not packed. Like I said, I couldn't care less uh.

Goguma, hwaiting!

Happy Belated Birthday, Yong Choding! ♥

I officially miss Yongseo. ♥♥

last time together.

2011-06-17T15:24:00.002+08:00

my mini beloved laptop is down and it seems like i can't post and edit my freaking pictures. so, all i have to do is rely on my ipad. but things aren't going well, apparently. since ipad is more to the mobile type, and i don't like it even though i spent hours on it playing games and also facebook and mobile twitter. hmm. thank god i had the time to upload wednesday's pictures or otherwise, life would be a living hell! and damn the fact that today's the seventeenth. ha ha ha.

and i kinda miss bringing my 'shlongboard' (adapted from kak nisa) home. i've been asking safwan to bring my board home cause i thought mom's gonna make a big deal of my baby. pfft. but it's okay, i guess i'm gonna fetch shlongy today. hahaha! and honestly, i've been spending a lot of time at banks and scape and i'm pretty much constant with my 180degrees hand slide. i wanna try double pendy and also stand up slide but everything just seems impossible huh!

okay, just kill me. i should have placed my commitment in my studies instead of skate but i just can't seem to control my obsession! speaking of which, i'm pretty much obsessed with cheese. and i can't believe i brought home a packet of cheese from long john last tuesday. sanggup eh. and that reminds me! i have a kfc date with my little sabrina sabrina-. haha! :) looking forward to that when school reopens. maybe she should bring her friend too, just to make sure things don't get really awkward. hmmmmmmmm....

"because at 10.58pm, i'm expecting another call."

s u c k s

2011-06-13T02:21:00.002+08:00

It's 2:22am and I'm forcing my eyes to stay open because I just feel I needed to post on my blog for just a while, and I think blogging just makes me feel better. Ya, even though I let my all out on Twitter, I just think blog is my best company although I only update once in a blue moon. The reason I've been spending less time on the computer is because of the iPad my brother brought home recently and I can't keep my hands off that baby. And it's very addictive though. I feel like pressing the buttons every single time and clicking to Youtube each time I get. Since Abang got his own iPad 2, I suppose I could use this iPad though.

Everyone else in the house gets mad every time I use it, exception for first brother though. And I'm staying up late so he'd get to sleep first for a good rest before he goes back to camp in the morning. And I just wanted to do him a good favour by printing his paperworks in the afternoon later on. I'm gonna miss my brother, that's all!

And the fact that I keep texting Nadhirah everyday, makes me feel so complete. That fatty may just be someone ordinary but wah, she makes me feel like I have nothing else to worry about, as a true friend should. Reminds me of the talk I had with brother. He's really worried about who I'm friends with because I'm not good at choosing friends and I feel that I'm insecure myself. Haha! Things just get real bad when they don't go the way you want it to. This is life, what else can you do about it? :)

On the other hand, I texted Umi in the evening and she said she felt great because I was the first person to text her at that hour.. Well maybe other than dan. :)

I should be heading to sleep now. Wouldn't wanna wake up late for tomorrow's outing. Chaosxz.

Imma love love you tonight.

2011-06-06T22:45:00.003+08:00

I had a great time with this gemok today, since he accompanied me home from the famous durian building in Singapore. Okay, in short, Esplanade lalat. And the most surprising but fascinating fact was, he came with a longboard and the both of us cruised along clarke quay and eventually we got scared over a k9 dog. haah! I just think we were so cute. Okay wtv, and we had a long long talk in the bus, from phones, to families. I felt weird too, cus' i was smiling like an asshole after he went off on his longboard.
I just felt good that we caught things up together. Hee! :D

And this? I just had the mood to snap only one picture for the day and Elfs really wanted to be the first one to like my picture and he succeeded. Haha, funny la that bimbo!

random bitch

2011-06-01T22:48:00.002+08:00

It's been almost a week since I last posted and greatest apologies! I honestly forgot to post frequently and the pressure of my malay o'level was in so, I couldn't really think much for blogging, but facebook? 24/7. Honest remark though. And after 2 months 'cutting' in art class, I finally bought my art coloured papers and I swear the colours I got has no tone. I'm so disappointed cause' I didn't choose wisely and apparently, since I'm always beside Hazim, I get jealous cause' he got pretty colours. Ahhh.

And I made a new longboard friend last Monday. Hilmi Lim!
Haha, okay eventhough we didn't talk at our first meet, but whatever. Let's see, I suppose we're gonna meet once again! Not saying I really want to, but what the hell, he's just a friend. A nice one with that :)
I complained to Elfs about how 'interesting' our conversation was and all he did was laugh.
Kill you then you know.

AND I LOVE MY BLOGSONG!!!!! ♥♥

Someone took a portion of my heart.

2011-05-25T22:01:00.003+08:00

Am definitely aware that Cultural was so last week. And I managed to snap a few photos with these people and I'm kinda glad though. I didn't have the time to go around and ask people to snap photos with me. But it's okay, I'm looking forward to our own personal made prom after my o levels. My gummy bears longboard peeps are so cute! Honest. Just so glad they're here with me till today. And tension coming round, since my MT o's is just next week. I think I'm doing fine in MT intensive classes, but I have to revise my peribahasa. I suck to the core. HAHA!

I went for art today and apparently, my mind was totally disturbed. I couldn't concentrate much on my papercut but I think I cut a lot. Up next, the colour pasting. I don't know, I think I'm gonna move the same pace as Shz since she's doing her art piece with me almost every time and I feel bad today cause' I didn't talk much. Got home and I had a slight headache for awhile.

Plus point, Shz, Wan, Fan, Ris, Fidz, and Fiq managed to see my sister before she went off.
Missing that little kid, truckloads.
Dunno when's the next time I'm gonna see her. Bad, real bad.

can't take it any longer.

2011-05-22T00:22:00.002+08:00

I felt different during Cultural Night. Maybe because of the curls! I love the fact that I went over to Piqa's house on the afternoon of the show night just to dress myself up there with the other three - Syak, Mirah & Piqa, of course. I was trying to avoid nearing the cats, thinking it might attack me or something! Haha! Too paranoid right there!

And Safwan aka Bola-bola made the most random remark ever in my whole week. Hectic.
"maybe your right ,sometimes its hard to forget the past.sorry if i made you forget about the past .its your choice ,sorry if i made you or made you forget your past (:"
I really thought through about what he meant and honestly, I miss the past. But nothing could change that anyway. Made a resolution for my life.
SMILE! That's best thing I could do! Hee.
I wanna make the most wise decision anyone can make.
I want my life back.

do you really have to.

2011-05-18T22:19:00.002+08:00

Uncle is finally discharged from hospital and no more registering ic numbers at the counters. Okay, I swear I'm gonna miss that part. And the last time I registered was yesterday and woop, it was the seventeenth. I don't care what people are gonna think but swear, every seventeenth is my favourite date. One way or another, although we're not together anymore, I still love number seventeen. :)
Okay chit, on the other hand, I visited uncle at Teck Whye today and I'm glad he's conscious whenever he talks to me. And he tried bribing me so that I'd take care of him every single day with Ramlee burger from the bazaar. Hahaha, he makes me feel like a fat kid who is definitely desperate for food. :(
But rest assure, I'm gonna be a good niece and visit him each time I get. And I promised I'll be at his house after 5 tomorrow! I just feel so good and relieved now that he's home. Although his eyes are still swollen after the plastic surgery, I'm happy that he still recognizes me. I feel so loved by uncle.

Apart from everything there, I received the most random missed call ever in 2011.

Truth is, I was never a strong girl. I know how much I have to hide the misery beneath my smile but since this is my blog, I have to express what's inside of me although it involves you. I know, yes I'm aware myself. I said that I moved on, but I don't really trust myself in making this ruthless decision. How irritating or devastating it can be, I never got over you. and the missed calls you gave me? I'm not even sure if that's really you who's calling. Apart from all these, I admit that I still kept our pictures in my wallet, just that you weren't aware of. I'm sorry I couldn't take this huge blow that was brought upon me. Even though our relationship didn't go far than I expected, you were making up the most of me and when you went away, I don't even know how to face myself, to handle the situation I was in. I doubt you even care about me now, and I still ponder over the reason you called. Sorry I couldn't take any of your words to move on and pretend that you never existed. Don't you worry, I'm gonna stand on my own pretty soon. If I don't, sorry, there's nothing else I could do.
17th will forever be remembered :')

been strong for too long.

2011-05-15T21:41:00.003+08:00

Yes, I spent the whole week going to Novena and visiting uncle and I feel good. Amir claimed that I've changed, in terms of commitment to the family and etc. For which, I rarely texted anyone, yes, neglecting him too. Heh. Apa punya kawan eh kau Atyqa. So anyway, I'm repeating my favourite K-Band song on youtube and it seems like I'm addicted to it, since it's such a cute cute cute song! On the other hand, I had to take a day off and went to the beach with the girls and honestly, I felt so carefree on that day. Thanks to them, although my foot hurts after that long day and thanks to them, again, I finally rode the luge for the first time in my entire life. Err, I'm so happy though. Apart from that, little sister and the other gays made my day yesterday. I couldn't stay longer but yeahhhh, I love you guys! :)

I realized that I haven't been going out to longboarding sessions with Elfs, Wan & Mok. I just think I'm in the wrong and to tell the truth, I'm not in the mood to do so when uncle is in this condition. I just feel so bad. And I'll get back to you guys asap!

I'm not in any position to say this, but FFFUUUU I REALLY NEED A BREAK FROM SCHOOL. I earned myself 4 days of weekends this week and unfortunately there are breaks in between, which is tomorrow. And the day after is Vesak Day. Another public holiday. HMM! Thank god Singapore is multi-racial, otherwise we wouldn't have these holidays right!

I know I have a lot to say, whatever! I met AinaSister ♥ today, like finally. Since the paternal family had a belated Mother's Day celebration at Bukit Panjang Community Club today, he-who-should-not-be-named and I asked her to come down and meet us since I miss her! Sister didn't look okay, because she looks so down. Anyway, we talked and she really did complain to me about how complicated her life is, now. I just hope she'll be okay. Hugs & Kisses.

And I can't believe I wore a dress, again, today. TSK.
NO MORE DRESSES OKAY ATYQA.

rushy post huh

2011-05-09T08:29:00.002+08:00

To sum everything up, my weekend was honestly rough. Despite the fact that uncle was hospitalized and had to go through a lot of different surgeries, I have to rush myself to the hospital today since no one else is there. Maybe just to accompany granddad there from being alone. And to be frank, I've been going out alone at some point of time and being alone really felt good. Since it's Monday today and there's exams tomorrow, I have to bring my books there to study so I'll do it whenever I'm free. I just want to ace my POA so bad.

Okay back to the topic. I have yet to bathe now but I should, anytime now. I'm going out right after. Guess I'll have my alone time at Novena Square later on. WOOPWOOP.

distractions.

2011-05-04T19:48:00.004+08:00

Finally Wan agrees to a picture. And I appreciate the time they put aside to accompany to Left Foot to get my shoes. And yeah, as guys, they have great sense of colours too. The fact that they chose green for me, I'm elated because it surprisingly matches with my green Abec 11 wheels. Although they were being sarcastic, trying to making me regret buying the green shoe, it didn't work. I was happy enough! Haha! But thing didn't go the way I wanted. Okay wait, not exactly yesterday. But I just think today is so fucked up.
Honestly.

I got home by 2pm and I watched No Strings Attached. Ironic much. On the other hand, it made me think about how messed up my life. Yes, although the show is about sex buddies, it totally totally totally reminded me of relationships & boyfriends. I'm aware I shouldn't think about these things at this point of time, but what can I do? Nyehaha, things just happen. I'm trying to cheer myself up. And the most shocking thing was, Yan talked to me and asked me about my ex-boyfriend. Another thing that made me reminisce. Ish, I knew something was gonna happen. So my instincts were right all along.

Now, I'm craving for Ben & Jerry's One Cheesecake Brownie. AHHHHH ~

Hi meet my baby.

atyq[a]tika ♥

2011-04-28T22:04:00.004+08:00

Ahum, this will be a very random dedication to my little sister,
ATIKA SARI BINTE KAMSARI♥
with lots of love.

I really appreciate you posting for me for umpteen times on your blog and yes, I noticed! Hahaha, you are very sweet as a little sister. Just so you know, I never regretted knowing you since you were primary six. Aww, so little already know me. Why eh why! Hahah, and I remembered your reaction when I surprisingly came down for your 12th birthday bash. I hope my presence that day was meaningful for you. Well, if it isn't, takpe la wahai adikku! Hahah! And yeah, after 4 to 5 years knowing you, you now play a part in my life.

Don't you dare leave me or I'll slash your head off.
Ya allah, tak sweetnye aku sebagai kakak!

And I really know how much you want to kill me for posting this picture.
Masyaallah, selekeh nye kite zaman zaman dua ribu lapan. Hahaha, takpe.
Kite tetap cute kan.
Atyq[A]tika FTW, and I love love love you ♥

Macam macam lah karena kau, adik. Gossip la, complain la! Hahaha, it's okay.
I, as your sister, will always stand by your side and hear you complain.
It won't hurt anyway :)

From here....

Sampai macam gini la kite. Hahaha, sweet kan i! :P

And you should be thankful, there are many people out there who cares for you. That includes me, apparently. Whenever you need a hug, or a listening ear, mind you, I'm always here. :)
Since tomorrow's the start of your exam too, I wish you the best of luck.
Pass your exams with flying colours and make me proud too! ♥♥
Hugs & kisses, love & misses.
And if 'he' is still the reason you're still emotionally disturbed, better be moving on.
Show him you can go through without him.
You're a strong girl and I love you.

Love love love.

2011-04-28T20:28:00.002+08:00

I looked so cranky in this picture but yes, I smiled okay! Hahaha!

I don't usually come up with plans on Thursday because there are no remedial or supplementary classes. And my final plan? I watched a little part of Regent Idol second round of auditions and headed to the school library to study with Nadhirah. At least I cleared some of my doubts, although we were mostly talking and laughing. And Umi messaged me, asking me if I was going for Art remedial. So I paid art guru a small visit at the art room, then I headed to D&T to meet with these three bimbos. I had so much fun there and Izzat freaking pinched my cheeks a lot of times and the by-product, no pain. HAHA!!

Adding on, tomorrow is the first Mid-year paper and it's English. For goodness sake, I'm scared I'd fail English again, but I really have to buck up! Like seriously. Thank god I improved a lot on my Principles Of Accounts, but most of the notes are still under my desk. So gonna bring it home tomorrow. One way or another, I have to, anyway. Plus, I really really really have to study for Maths this Tuesday. It's gonna be so dreadful since I just got back from Malaysia, I suppose. And yes, I'm going away to KL this Saturday. Uh, on the other hand, I wanna get kicks there, or at least a pair of skate shoes. How to longboard with shoes, you tell me!

Popping bottles in the ice.

2011-04-24T11:38:00.002+08:00

it's the twenty fourth today, and apparently, it's fatty fatin's sweet sixteenth!
it's kinda weird to cal her fatin, but it just rhymes with fatty. heh.
so, i would like to take this opportunity, to wish my AUNT,

A wonderful happy sweet 16th! May all your wishes come true and stay fat & happy always! "BILA NAK TINGGI?!" Hahaha. And truth is, I really enjoyed at your birthday party last Friday. Glad you had fun too. And I dieted because of you. Chey fake, why would I? Haha!!
See you on Monday and you shall get your present by this week okay! Sorry for delaying. Hehe, I love you, forever and alwayzzzzz! ;)

Another plus point, I woke up around 11 today, and I have yet to take a bathe.
BUT, I still have the fragrance okay. No bacin, bacin. Hehe.

Life.

2011-04-21T02:58:00.004+08:00

To tell the truth, my Life is being a bitch these days. In particular, today. I disappointed Umi that easy, and I'm truly sorry. I don't get why people wants to bring me down, seeing me so happy with my way of living. I just think it's good enough that I don't give you hell. And my first priority from now onwards would be my studies. I don't think I want to disappoint my family over and over again. And I am so glad I can cope with my Principles Of Accounts, but not my art anymore. I feel so bad that I'm letting down, but I don't know if I could really cope with my Art. I just feel like dropping sooner or later.
Guess I have to make up my mind before paying the fees.

In addition, tomorrow's Regent's Annual Cross Country and I hope last year's drama won't repeat itself. Okay, okay. I know I sound so pissed, but I just think I gotta let my feelings out. My blog, my say. Right? :)

I really feel like going out tomorrow. Shall ask Shazalina, Wawan, Farris & Elfy along. Not to forget, CURLY WURLY. Haha, yes.
Syafiq Sulaiman.
I miss Ayna-sister♥ too much, I just think I need her right now.

On a random note, I'm not gonna find myself a boyfriend till I finish my o'level.

On a more random note, I guess ♥Cha will be a very pretty girl in the future. VERY.

they, forevermore ♥

2011-04-19T22:42:00.002+08:00

"I had the most exciting moment, but at the same time the most awkward moment on that particular date with my beloved Umi,and Danny & Mai:)"

Anyway, majority of my friends find me different these few days. How should I say this? I want to justify that many things are disturbing me on my mind. And I rarely talked today, but to Amir? It was the most natural thing ever. I told him every single thing I felt, but with his endless 'feeling-it' attitude, I ignored him for a minute, which made him desperately find me back again. Okay fake.

On the other hand, I ate more than I should since last Thursday and I feel very fat. The most unusual thing that's happened to me was, I can't sleep comfortably since the Coffee club outing last week and I am not sure of whether I have insufficient sleep because of the caffeine I consumed. Whatever it is, I should be getting my rest now. Otherwise, things are gonna get more and more dreadful each day.

Additional to this, my brother is going to be enlisted in the army soon and I'm kind of insecure. Okay, sounds very awkward but I hope he's gonna do well in there :) PLUS, I really really really really really miss my big sister - Aina♥
I should really plan to meet her one day.
Am happy that she's loving school now :)
Hugs & kisses, love & misses k big sister! ♥♥♥♥

2011-04-17T14:57:00.002+08:00

As much as I don't want you to leave, you have to. With that, little sister. I'm gonna miss you when you're gone with your new family.

It's too soon. We took care of you since you were three days old, and it felt very good. We watched you grow up for the past 5 months and yes, we love you like our own. As a family member of yours, I shall act like I'm not sad upon your leave, like everyone's doing. And now, I gotta see you happy with your new mommy.
You were only 3 months old and you started responding to us whenever we call your name, being so hyperactive with that. and now that you know ibu takes care of you, it's a little bit impossible to separate from her. and one thing's for sure, each time you smile, brings up the smile in everyone.

you are the most beautiful little sister i've ever had and i swear, nothing else could replace you. and i hope in the future, you would remember as i am, calling out to your name, and grabbing my finger with your whole hand.

I tend to get so excited whenever I meet you and holding you in my arms, embracing you. And every time you cry, it breaks my heart to see. I just think you grew up rapidly, and you're a very clever girl. Bijak.

Another plus point, you grew up to be so photogenic and a very happy girl. I'm glad we led you through this way and yes, I'm grateful that for once, you actually made us smile with that laughter and the funny moments we shared.

and i'm so sorry if i ever made you cry. well, i actually did. haha, but i'll remember every single i have with you and i'm gonna miss tying your little ponytail and you leaning on my shoulder every single time i carry you.

and now that you have only a couple of weeks to stay with us till your new mom comes and get you, i will cherish every single moment i have with you, till then. and capturing the moments with you. for which, i did.. and it was yesterday.

this is the most improper picture i have with you. but i find it uber adorable, and although the picture is a bit blur there, at least you're in it. and ibu will miss you alot for sure. everyone will. so, we're gonna slowly let you go willingly. one way or another, we just have to do it.

I ♥ Y O U , cha.

p.s: i'm missing you already.

I'm running out of time.

2011-04-13T22:44:00.002+08:00

Personally, today was the most exciting ever. Although plans of staying back for Art was last minute, I think I helped with cleaning up the art room today. On the other hand, I had a bonding moment with the teachers and Maisarah Hainee too. I just had a lot of fun, no other words can describe my day today. Plus, Danny Skoner and Hafidz was there too. Despite the fact that my legs were tired from climbing up and down the stairs today, I just felt good after helping out the Art teachers. And favourite moment was, I quarreled with Hafidz just because of a pack of fries. Which, I was hungry and snatched it away from him and didn't share with anyone else. Mr Iz too told Hafidz and Dan about me & Mai in first year and it was so embarrassing but what to do. We were unfortunately lame in year one. Hahaha!

Honestly, I had a good time talking to Mai today.
I sound so hypocrite cause I keep asking people to think for themselves, while I don't.
I don't know why, but I just can't see people suffer. Well, maybe some.
But for this girl, I ain't gonna let it slip.
Happiness is indeed a vast thing in life.

P.s: Umi Faz sent me home today. CHO CHWEEET! CHIIIIIIT !

Hugs&kisses, love&misses.

2011-04-12T20:39:00.004+08:00

The most random pathetic thing I felt today was a hell load of missing. Honest. The fact that I really really miss this little brother of mine (although he's literally bigger than me), and I kinda miss texting him and hear him rant about his daily no-lifer days, and chit! Not to mention, girls. Hahah, Muhammad Afiq Safuan, mana hilang?!?! Haha, cheer up anyways and take good care of yourself while I'm away. Sister is always on your side.
Hmmm, wonder if you think of me like I do. CHIIT! Nyehnyeh.

Moving on. I've been joking around with these two for too long already. Hahah, and to sum the jokes we had for the last 4 months we had, I really savored the moment I had with them during our Malay supplementary yesterday afternoon. I shared the Malay 5-year series book with the both of them, and we ended up not finishing our exercises instead. Frustrating much on that part but yeah, both of them are a great companion. Sorry that the picture above sucks as much! Hahaha. But I just find it funny and adorable though. And Kir, thanks for having lunch with me each time during recess. So funny! :D Haikal, ermmmm. I'll get back to that. NYEH! :P

And, despite all of that, it's confirmed plus chop that I miss Syakila♥♥ too! Even though we meet in school every single day, I just feel that we hadn't been communicating much. Probably it's the change of the seating arrangement and I honestly hate it. Yes, although it's for my own good, but damn, how do I talk to her. On the other hand, we've been talking alot with Amirah and it's sort of, interesting. And oooohhh Syak, I MISS YOU ALOT. We need to catch things up. Haissss. It's gonna be a random action, but I'm so gonna hug you tomorrow. I so sweet. CHIT! :P

I think I miss too many people. But who the hell cares.
Finally, this love of mine. Lianling, I miss you heaps, seriously. :(
I miss how much we used to text each other without stopping. I miss how much we would complain to each other about so many issues. Not to mention, 2pm and T.O.P. I miss how much you'd be so interested to hear me talk about how much I love skate. I miss how much you cared for me. Things just fell apart. Since it's gonna be our final year, I'm going to cherish every moment I have with you and I promise that. I love you, gorgeous girl. ♥♥

#foreverhungry.

2011-04-08T22:14:00.002+08:00

A thousand apologies for not updating my blog since the end of last month. Time flies too fast and it's already April. Unbelievable, which means o levels are coming in less that seven months. Good luck to you, atyqa. I started out on my revisions, but truth is, I don't give my focus to my studies now, but I'm proud to say, I improved on my POA and I recently passed my Bad debts test but it was borderline. Mr Neo thinks it's best if I retake the test and get better marks. Well, he believes I can. Argggh, I can't handle expectations. But I have to do it for my beneficial anyway.

Probably wanting to get into School of Business is absurd but who cares? I know myself better than anyone does. And I can't wait to get O levels over and done with! My aim? 14 points! Hahaha, I guess I have to trust myself too. Okay, on the other hand, I have to start revising, and stop procrastinating. Typical school kid procrastinates. Haha! Ermmm, Atyqa, speak for yourself. At least my obedience is getting better each day. I think so? Hahah, I'm so crappy right now. I'm feeling so cranky because I didn't have enough sleep.

I shall catch my beauty dreams right after mom comes home. Yes, I'm home alone.

P.s: Sorry, I don't have little cousins who wishes I'd die early.
I'm sorry I'm being harsh to you guys, but think. Stop talking about guys. Or even that particular guy I hate. Seriously, just stop that & I'll respect you. Tsk.

Too hot for you to leave her?

2011-03-30T21:58:00.003+08:00

Hmm, how do I say this? I spent almost the whole week at CCKCC's area to cruise around with Elfy,Wawan & Syafiq. Despite all that, I've been studying. Erm, at least I think I am? But I stayed back for a few classes today, and I am very tired already. Since there's a POA tomorrow, I worked my ass off around 6 this evening and I am glad I can cope with my Final Accounts now.
Yes, although I still spend my time on internet, I promise I'd study for O levels. I want my freedom too okay. On the other hand, I'm getting my Madrid board soon enough. I'm not gonna distract myself too much. I just want my leisure time.

Apart from that. Moving on... I really wanna update my music playlist in my phone cause it's getting a little cranky since there's only old songs. Okay maybe three quarter of it is filled with new songs. In addition, a couple of Bruno Mars' songs too. Uh huh, a fan of him! I find myself so unfriendly nowadays. My mood get so fucked up so easy huh. And now, I'm thinking about Lady Gaga. Er, she's getting creepier each day, and that reminds me of Rihanna. Chris Brown must be ashamed to have an absurd ex now. But still, they were sweet together. Ahhh, I miss listening to CB's songs. OK! Gonna do it now. :P

2011-03-29T22:54:00.002+08:00

This idiot who is with me for like almost 2 to 3 years already and yeah, looking forward to plenty of plans with him next month. I can't waitttt! And wee I spent my time with him and 3 others today. Yes, that includes elfy, wawan & syafiq sulaiman. Awesome, but I'm really sorry Amir, about the Swensens thingy. ERRR. :(

Ps I haven't been myself lately. Just kill me. I no mood already. :(
And I left my phone in Syafiq's bag. Screwed up too much today. But cruising was awesome today.

GHETTO.

2011-03-26T04:04:00.002+08:00

HAHA, I'm talking nonsense now. Okay, Atyqa. It's 4.15am. BRRR.

The meaning of my true life.

2011-03-22T21:27:00.002+08:00

Sister said I looked haggard today.
Okay, maybe because I was falling sick. Serve you right, Atyqa. That's why they say you should bring an umbrella wherever you go. Tsk, I regret not bringing my umbrella home yesterday. Not being a deal anyway. And sister nagged at me as I keep falling sick and my immune system is not that strong. YA, like hers. Haha! And yeah, I bumped into her today and I really really missed her. I wanna meet her again lah! Much much much misses. In prior to that, I wanna bring her out. Haha, okay I just don't know where.

Moving on. Ismail asked if I'm gonna watch tomorrow's match @ Bukit Gombak Stadium. I don't know if I wanna go, since there are extra Maths classes tomorrow and I have to go. Apparently, it's time to buck up and I have parent teachers meeting this Friday. Ironic much? But on the other hand, I am glad because I have a senior mentor in school so they'd guide me for my O'levels. Yeah, sounds so uptight but interesting at the same time. I wanna go to Korea this year so I have to make mum proud. I love you, mum. HEHE. ;) xoxo.

Am chatting with Didy Yanjon. Haha, yes that small kid. So much of his random questions.

AWESHUM.

2011-03-20T22:17:00.003+08:00

Universal Studios was an awesome experience and yes, I had fun with the other nine of them. Yes, they certainly made my day. BUT, (yes, there's a but), I'm sorry that I got angry because I was ultimately late for my curfew. And yes, i'm definitely a girl with curfew, early ones with that. Unfortunately, I still choose to break those ground rules. MOM & DAD, sorry. I love you, but exception for USS last night okay. Hehe. :3 And the rides were apparently rough and I vomited my lunch. There goes my nasi ayam. Okay, disgusting but whatever it is. AWE-SOME! So much of adrenaline rush, and raging hormones. HAHA.
Psst, and there is school tomorrow.

So, for the past seven days, I've been spending almost all of my time with these two. Maybe because we are starting to plan on debuting a crew. Gonna be a secret for now, but I am in! Yeah, I'm starting to love long boarding and I was watching the PR videos, apparently making me fall in love with long boarding and surfing. I'm getting my madrid board soon enough. I just gotta save. And that reminds me, I have to save for my trip to Seoul in December/January. Still a long way to go huh? I'm hooked on the plans already. I'm just so excited. Hehe, and total turn because tomorrow is the start of term 2. I gotta start changing, even though I don't do my homeworks -.- Okay. And yeah, aunt's gonna let my 4 month-old sister stay with me the next fortnight. She's sleeping with me:P

Nineteenth.

2011-03-16T16:24:00.002+08:00

The fact that I don't know what to post about,
BUT.
.
..
...
..
.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR 19TH MARCH! PARTY ALL DAYYYYY.
Hehehehe.

Just give me time.

2011-03-13T14:19:00.002+08:00

Erm, the fact that I'm eventually spending my Sunday at home again? Almost everyone in the family went out, except for Abang is. I was online since 1pm and now i ran out of things to do. Okay, maybe tweets and just blogging? Haha, shall browse through tumblr later on. I shall relive my tumblr site again, i kinda miss it thou. :x andddd, screw it, i have lessons on tuesday and wednesday. should i go? tsk, life is so boring. well, maybe not until universal studios. i'm seriously looking forward to it!
.
..
...

Apart from that, thank god there's so school tomorrow. So i suppose i'll turn in a bit late tonight. Maybe. Omo, i should apparently find some time to kill. mum & dad come home fast please. shall we go bugis today? or shall we go visit danny & chantek today? life is so fucked up. fml.
and on a random note, FORT CANNING SO KENANGAN-ISH.

Peaches or pecahs?

2011-03-12T17:58:00.003+08:00

What a boring Saturday. To be awaken by the text message on my phone, it was only 10.50am! I had to drag myself out of my blanket cuz' I wanted to watch episode thirteen and fourteen of Dream High at 11.10. But, before that, I turned on to MTV, and still, it was Lady Gaga's Born this Way. Erm, I just don't know what's the motive of the music video. Okay whatever, I don't give a damn though. Plus, episode fourteen was very, how should I put it, hmm, very eye-opening. How Baekhui & Hyemi became best friends again. Haha, okay another flashback. And yeah, i watched Remake of Love Language on youtube right after. Told Fit about it, and he heaved a sigh of disappointment?
Coincidence much? I'm more or less disappointed to have four ex-boyfriends. For which, I wasted my whole 4 years. Okay, I'm not assuming I regret being their girlfriend or whatsoever. I just wished I didn't fell in love in the first place. Hehe, and yeah, I am probably moving on easy. Plus, I don't care if I lost the break up win. It doesn't really matter! ;)
As long as I know I'm happy, it's good enough to know. I just think that my family matters the most! Erm, yeah and my friends too. How can I ever thank them. Hehehe.
I'm trying so hard to carry on. I am! I am!

Both of them. ♥

2011-03-11T23:57:00.003+08:00

Tsk, I was planning to take O'Level art pictures instead of going out. But I think I got too distracted with the shopping @ Bugis and yes, I spent a lot there. Well, at least I had fun with Dan & Aina. Heh. And even though Dan came last minute and we had to wait, I'm at least more 'motivated' since he brought his awesome cool shit camera along. But before that, I met sister first with her boyfriend and took picture with the boyfriend's iPhone. Most of the time, we played Talking Carl and I came up with an application of my own, the 'Laughing Aina'.
Haha! Awesomezzzscx.

Plus, I had a good time laughing with sister & brother. Yes, they probably made my day on Wednesday. And sister sure did spend a lot at Animal. And me, as a good best friend, helped Amir in getting his Animal tee and he should really be appreciative of that! Hmm, moving on. Burger King dinner on that night was cute. Snapped ALOT of pictures and the three of us came up with double chin jokes, and I eventually drank lemon tea. WHICH, I hated a lot. Okay, forgiven lah, since it's an accident. Hahaha. And I walked passed 313@Somerset and flashback! Thank god I didn't break down and throw tantrums. I so cute right perangai. HAHA!!
I honestly love my brother & sister. They so cute like me, ♥.
Hahahaha, k atyqa perangai kanina.

bad guy? still, it's you i adore.

2011-03-03T22:19:00.003+08:00

I just don't get why I post on either Fridays, Saturdays or just on Sundays. So much of the weekend? So anyway hi, this is my first post on a Thursday. Or is it? Haha! AND, I'm getting used to the gym equipments every Tues & Thurs and I am particularly glad about working out. I just want a flat tummy. And Dollah's tip, DON'T EAT AFTER NINE!
What to do, thank god I can endure. And now, my eyes half closing and I plan to sleep at eleven today. It sounds good, cause' I'm gonna get erm... 8 hours of sleep! Perfect.
And yeah, gym session today - was totally last minute. I didn't plan to go, but Taufixed eventually forced me to, and after the gym session was dinner. Additional to that, I had a good laugh with Dollah & Taufiq. They're just fucking funny.
Moving on....
I don't know if I'm invited on this 19th. But I really want to go to Universal Studios. Who doesn't want to?! Damn it, now must baik baik with Haiqal ask if I can come along. Pretty please. Haha. I'd be so heartbroken if I didn't get to go. Go one corner cry ah Atyqa. Hmm, maybe no Universal Studio, go out with Sister & danial bo also swee. Dslr please! Hahaha. What the hell. Am texting dearest brother & best friend. EH YA, Dollah & Taufixed were really looking forward to seeing me with tudung. Random much? But Imma try it someday. Haha, tak berniat yet. Back to the topic, hahaha okay I miss my sister alot. Should go visit her, but pecahhh ezlink no money already. It's okay, tomorrow's TGIF. Okay, no link :D

count me in? ♥

2011-02-27T01:44:00.003+08:00

Okay, there wasn't any bailing out today. But there were last minute meet ups, and yes, I was glad that I met my little sister and I think I spent a lot of time with them ladies today. Oh not to forget, the guys too. But we were bitchy today and Ashiqin's laugh was very contagious and I laughed at her laugh instead of the jokes we had for today. How amusing. And we walked around town. Apart from that, our usual spot! Marina bay sands. There was a water fountain show with neon lights and Ashiqin found it very interesting! Well I found it nice too! Hehehe. Nice rainbow lights in the sky. Super cute and we took our polaroids! Hmmmmmm...

And on the way home, I shared Taufiq's mp3 and heard songs I transferred into his mp3 last week. Damn, I wasn't into any mood. It's like I've gone mad. I was looking out of the bus window. The first thing that came to my mind was. Uh. I'd rather die than to mention that anonymous name. K, Fit is talking to me right now. He broke down as much as I did, and there's this thing called love, keeps getting in my way when I'm trying to speed up in my life. Leave me alone already! I just can feel the pain. I should try sleep it off for now? Okay, shush. The mp3 is on random shuffling and I don't get why the songs it's playing are very 'kecundang'. Pandai juga ini mp3 scan mood eh.

what's up with me eh? ♥

2011-02-25T21:43:00.002+08:00

I've thought through. Haha, yes staying on wouldn't be much of a help anyway. Heh, besides, it was just a month relationship! Stupid me took a grace one month to realize. And TGIF. I'm alone at home now, and I'm feeling my muscles straining after yesterday's three to four hours at the gym. I can't take the pain but I absolutely will go to the gym every week. Amir told me not to eat after 9, but unfortunately, the family's going out for supper later on. Okay, I should really stop my habit of eating after 9pm okay. And lately, I've not been myself. Err, since Danny's at the hospital right now, and yet to be discharged. More or less, I feel worried. Hmmm..
Come on fat boy, come home soon. I'm sure mak misses you. I pray for your recovery little boy:)

Apart from all that, sissy tweeted that she wanted to talk to me. Okay hmm, as in talk crap with me and spilling out whatever that she's keeping in her heart. I assume she has a lot to pour and I do really feel like meeting her. I guess I just miss her, that's all. And I plan to get her a winnie-the-pooh tshirt. Wtf, yes I'm aware I'm THAT random but I really want to get her something to appreciate everything she did for me and stuffs. I'm a sweet little sister, am I not? Heh, and am planning again for USS. But this week, my allowance wasn't stable so I'm going to town instead. Maybe? Lol, we shall see who's gonna bail out tomorrow. Last minute plans rule, don't they. Right, I speak sarcasm.

I think my eyes are half-closing already. HAHA. Wait, wait. Supper, here I come!

I've ran out of 'if only's. ♥

2011-02-21T22:21:00.002+08:00

Day out with Taufiq, Amir and the gang was actually not that bad. Yes, it was hard putting on a smile over this misery. But once the day was done, it was not essential though. I really had a cheerful night with them, yes although the next day, I was still hooked up with exams. Last minute studies for History last night, but my upper eyelids were whispering me to go to sleep or other my lower eyelids' have a dark companion by them. I really want my panda eyes to go away lah.

And I was 'literally' invited to visit akak today. Why? Because Apis was there. Yes, the one I randomly talk to at times. Hahah, even though he was there only for a while, I myself suppose that he came back to Glacious to fetch me. Whatever lah, he went down at CC for his match till 11.30pm. Suka? Hahah! And I talked a lot with him today. Bonding moment with cousin eh? Haha, okay best. Hell yes, I got my things for Thursday and I'm all set to start on the gifts with my bitch. So tomorrow, lots of polaroid k? Yes Bryan, you must thank me for owning a polaroid camera. I sho sweet, I know. Hehehe! :>

And Taufiq wants me to go to gym so I can lose my fats. Insulting yet motivating. Hahaha, I should really lose the fats on my stomach man. And yes, my super duper muscular arm. Haha, I just sounded like a guy didn't I? Oh, what do I care? Heh, I love my sister and am texting her now. Loves.

I wouldn't change a thing ♥

2011-02-19T18:49:00.002+08:00

Plan with Taufiq today? Canceled. I didn't mind a lot though. And yes, replacing my plan today is day out with family. As usual. Why am I not surprised? Maybe Universal Studio's plan moved to next week, just as soon as common tests are over. Damn, I should have used the past six or eight hours to study my History but I forgot all about it. Ha ha. I'm all thumbs, I know. Diam. Moreover, I am really, honestly getting fat. It has been the best and the most awe-inspiring companion since the Twenty-first, I tell you. Wait, or is it? Ha ha! I just eat a lot, and Zaliha's chatbox popped up, and guess what she greeted with? "Hi tembamie!" So random and cute of her. Ergh, yes I'm definitely putting on weight. Okay, I'm in for perangai budak kurus lah! Kirakan cool lah? :))

Okay sudah. 5 papers down, 3 more to go. Selepas itu, UNIVERSAL STUDIOS AFTER HOURS OKAY!!!!!!!!!! ^^

♥ i got over you.

2011-02-18T22:43:00.002+08:00

Okay, pardon me for not updating for almost a week. Haha, so anyway, things are getting a little in control. I think I had fun last week, even though things just happen in the family. I really want to let it out to someone, but I think it's best keeping it to myself though. ;) Still, I'm a happy girl. Ouh yah, I went for Haiy's performance last Sunday, and I think it was nice though. Yes, he sings. Haha. And we had our dinner after that. Lucky Haiy got 2 tix for cinema and Wildwildwet for consolation prize. Pergi cinema sama mataeir liaoooo! :p Okayokay, we met the Mr. Faezil right after at Heeren and yes, Nasi ayam penyet for dinner. I was so happy and elated I tell you, watch Faezil cry over chilli. Okay, I sound so evil. All of them cried. Well, maybe exception for Taufiq. <:
To think I broke down on that day because of my family. Haha okay skip!

I caught a cold and now I'm starting to cough again. That means, Abang Is probably won't let me drink coke again. I have the right to be mad, but I shouldn't, cause it shows that he cares. Phew. And speaking of which, I assume my left eye is still swollen. There's this thing under the lid of my eye, I just don't know how to explain it! K lol! Whatever it is. Eye, get well soon! Itu lah, nangis banyak banyak lagi. Selenge girl. And yeah, I'm going out with Taufiq tomorrow, rather than being stuck at home doing nothing. Lantak lah, dengan Taufiq seorang pun tak ada kisah. I just want to go out. Fiq, let's go USS and just pay $5! Wee. And eaaaaaat! Heheh.

why didn't i realise you were there. ♥

2011-02-12T15:42:00.002+08:00

i rushed my first art mounting board on thursday. i seek sister for help and i had to do my work at her workplace. yes, glacious. i was really having my time there and spent more than eight hours there. akak got real bored and we had a really funny talk with each other, honest! even though sasha left first, her company was awesome toooooo. hahaha! and i got home around 10.15 that particular day cause i so kind help sister with her closing. happygirl_94 ah dia, dapat balik cepat. hahaha. <:
i feel like i'm suffering from fatigue uh these days. not enough sleep sia! okay okay. -.-
and hahaha,we had poa carnival yesterday. i don't have nothing much to do in particular,so i walked around the hall and i took charge of the avpa! woo,i played my songs and yes,i am happy. hahahha. and,i think i danced a lot on that day? okay seriously i don't know what's up with me okay! hahaha. and flag day was not that bad. even though i had to stand for more than 3 hours and collect those funds, i feel really good. and at the sight of notes,i get real excited. okay weird. sudah sudah,i'm going out with amir most probably at 6. nyeheheh.

come back. :'(

2011-02-05T14:10:00.002+08:00

the fourth was totally an awesome day. hee, getting to spend time with your friends and family at the same time is definitely dope. plus, i ate alot yesterday. i can't feel my cheeks anymore. hahaa, i swear i'm getting fat though. but it's okay. i think being fat is just normal. i'm enjoying life anyway. ha ha. alright, i miss yesterday already. and to think, we actually spent more than 12 hours outdoors and yez, one thing's for sure, i'm getting darker. boohoo. and pft, uncle and cousins teased me alot about ...... okay skip.
make me miss him more only. :/

i adore this girl. haha! erm, i love my sister, and nothing can replace that heh. i hope they had fun yesterday, like i did. eventhough i won first prize, HAHAHA it was not very essential present. still, i find it cute though. yez, i got a toy cow for being in first place. frustrating much? haha. it's okay, i think i'm gonna pass it to iffah instead. kids love toys, don't they? heh. and i got to have a cuppa of double chocolate last night. it's been long. hehehe :>

لا شيء يمكن أن يحل محل لك.

i will never try to deny, you were my whole life. ♥

2011-02-04T00:31:00.000+08:00

i sumpah, i had fun with ayah din's family today. it's honestly fun i tell you! and it was so random of me to bring my camera along today. at least we had some shots though. hehe. the jumpshots were ultimately a failure, and i got tired just after a few pictures. see, perangai budak gemuk. lompat sikit dah penat. i apparently find my family cute. and we mimicked jyp nation's pose. but the background tak perlu okay. hahaha! well, we had fun at the sentosa boardwalk, although my adidas kicks was killing me. hahaha, jyeah we had fuuuuuuuuuuuun. much loves. ;)

oh ya, i was supposed to do my braids today. but things just happen you know. i'm very sad. i should have my braids by now. but whatever, the world keeps getting in the way. and yeah, i'm gonna spend time with my family and friends at the same time tomorrow. okay, i mean today. since fiyan, atika and taufiq insisted on going to east coast with me and my family tomorrow, i hope we're gonna have loads of fun tomorrow. and we are definitely having some games tomorrow. how cute is my family maaaan. hehe. plus, i must not forget to bring the kite. taufiq really wants to fly a kite later, hee. cute ikr. okay okay okay, doa manyak manyak yok. i must make my sister happy tomorrow. xoxo.

i swear i had fun ♥

2011-02-03T00:11:00.000+08:00

uhm, today's plan was honestly last minute. but spending ten hours out with my friends on the eve of chinese new year was apparently sex-citing! the awesome day started off with three games of bowling. and we town-ed together after that. obviously, i am suffering from fatigue-ness dammit. we walked throughout the whole day, and thank god, i managed to keep myself happy for the day! alhamdulilah, zaliha was there to keep me company at times. plus, izzat was clinging on me? lol. hahah. but i really wanna thank you guys though, for making today happen. now, i'm tired. but i need to text izzat for the extra pictures. damn damn damn. ya allah, penat nya aku niari. hehehe.

okay so, i'm now uploading the photos at facebook i tell you it's taking too much time. still, i have to wait. and yez, the most random thing about me these days is, i post 'how to be fat' facts. i don't what's up with me, but it's what i do everytime. yez, i'm aware it's making me feel fat. but well at least, i'm still 45kg. hehehe, ringan or what?! chey, bangga aja. wtf. damn, damn. i'm ultimately thirsty, but i have to get things done first. woop woop, the pictures very naise today. ^^ and i've finally talked to haiy. it feels great to be gaining another friend again. hahaha.

I start anew.

2011-01-31T18:49:00.000+08:00

January has been rough on me. praises to God, i can pretty much handle my problems this month. and i swear, i saw a lot coming. my illness, my break up, my coping of studies, my family problems. yeay, i pulled through all of that. finally a new month is gonna come. i'm turning over a new leaf cheyyyyyyy. i don't pretty mind about love now. right.. who's gonna believe that? haha. thus, my friends are really completing my life already. i suppose nothing could ever replace them. and sometimes, we have to push and pull though! otherwise..... habis nanti tanduk terkeluar. kena pijak kepala baru rasa lah korang. hehehehe.

add, i'm totally in love i tell you. with my blog song. macam feeling feeling gitu. yez ah! and so sick of me, i'm hearing it on repeat. i just need the translated lyrics nao! plus, i'm soooo gonna learn the chords. haha, valentine's coming you know. but i single mingle. hehehe. takpa, danny elfy ada. dating sama budak tiga bulan pun jadi ah! heheh. i just want to update my blog regularly nao, like i usually do. i miss doing the things i do every time. ;)

اشتقت لك.